Reviving Our National Game

What a sporting day it was for India yesterday. People who would take the instance of the pathetic loss in cricket and won’t agree to my first line, then let me clear this at the outset – ‘Cricket team is not the team of India. It is at best the BCCI team and their win/loss doesn’t necessarily mean a win/loss of India’. Hence the so called diehard fans of cricket can stay away from this post as I really care rat ass if the money hungry cricketers won it or lost it or for that matter if Sachin was wrongly adjudged out or not. The favorite son of the soil Mahendra Sing Dhoni is doing the clarifications so don’t expect anything from this lesser mortal on our millionaire cricketers.
  

Back to the point for which I started writing this piece. The sorry image of us losing to Britain in Santiago and missing our flight to Beijing Olympics last time around is still fresh in many minds. We were dejected and felt like our national game going to oblivion with this final nail in the coffin. We were angry on our sports bodies for managing our national game so roughly and demanded heads be rolled both at the players as well as management end for such debacle. We blogged, twitted with an open defiance of many things as we were worried we may not see our national game getting the respect and applauds it deserves. That was a day and yesterday was another day.

 

Continuous performance of highest quality during the tournament has brought about a huge fan following of our Hockey team. People who had lost faith in our team after the Beijing qualifier routing were again getting interested on what is happening on the Hockey field. Backed by a 100% performance throughout the tournament when our team entered the Maj. Dhyan Chand stadium yesterday evening, it was no surprise that a jam packed stadium with Tricolor flattering everywhere greeted our players. What a clinical performance that followed. Clad in white our boys were everywhere with Sandeep seemed like he can’t just commit anything wrong yesterday. 5 out of 6 penalty corners were successfully deposited behind the net at thumping force and we were already issuing our boarding pass to London even before the French could realize how the lightning has struck them. And for sure with an 8-1 score line we can safely say, we thrashed France in the encounter. After a long time I felt the goose bumps seeing our team taking a victory lap with our Tricolor flying high everywhere. Before we move ahead let’s pause for a moment and ponder – So much of flair. Doesn’t cricket look pedestrian in comparison?

 

That said, let’s not forget the way we have mismanaged our national game for decades now and how we have systematically ruined the game that is synonym with our national identity. No support to our players in any form whatsoever; crooks and complete nonsense at the helm of Indian Hockey Federation; no recognition to our team who were performing under high duress and adversity. You name it and we have done that to sabotage our national game and its reputation. I still remember the college days of Rourkela and the apathy shown to our players. Panposh sports hostel which has produced players (many of them are world class) like Michael Kindo, Deelip Tirckey, Ignesh Tirckey, Sabu Varky, Lazrus Barla, Vikram Lakra didn’t had an AstroTurf stadium at their disposal. Forget about the AstroTurf, the Sector – 5 stadia they used to practice didn’t even had a clean tap to supply water to our players. The AstroTurf designated for the stadium had to be returned thrice due to lack of fund. It was only when the then Chief-Minister of Odisha Mr. Biju Pattnaik took a note of the mess and paid from his pocket for the turf that the stadium finally got it laid out. I am struggling for genuine answers. Can’t we spend 1.5 crores for our national game when we readily spend a double of the amount for a single visit of a scoundrel minister’s security? Is this what a nation can at best do for its national game? Instances of the apathy meted out to our Hockey team are many. Who can forget the plight of the Punjab state Hockey team who were forced to spend one day – two nights on the Guwahati railway station platform. Can’t we even arrange a decent hotel for the guys who represent us and keep our Tricolor flying high? Cant the people of Guwahati come forward with their help after seeing it on TV? Disgusting.

 

Along with the team there is an equal number of personal apathy towards our players even. On a direct flight to USA, a familiar face greeted me with a can of beer as part of the cabin crew members. The old college days flashed before my eyes and after mustering some courage I called the gentleman and asked – Are you by any chance Igensh Tirckey? After a brief silence he acknowledged my guess. Little did I know I would have embarrassed him by asking this question and followed by asking for his autograph in the laid out tissue in front of me. Reluctantly he honored my request and scribed IGNESH in the piece of paper. After I touched down, out of rage I wrote to Air-India and their complete insensitivity towards an Olympian. Can’t they offer him an administrative job at least? All that they can offer is a job as a crew member to serve beers to outright idiots like me on a flight? Disparaging. I am told Air-India have rectified this stupid act of theirs after that. Who can forget the tears of a great like Dhanraj Pillay? Perhaps one of the best forwards the world hockey has ever seen, he was left with no option but to cry before the cameras and vow not to allow his son ever to adore the sports which always was his life. Could we have asked for a worse scenario for our national game? A three time Olympian had to cry before us to let know the nonchalant behavior of our sports bodies towards the servants of our national game. If we haven’t yet hang our heads in shame for allowing this to happen then there must be something grossly wrong within us. Did anyone has forgot the case of Rajiv Mishra yet? We shouldn’t, at least on the largest interest of national pride.

 

Look at the Indian Hockey Federation and the hawks that run it. A tremendous defender and Olympian like Pargat Sing can’t win the Hockey Federation election because of acute politics while complete garbage having little or no knowledge of the game adoring the chair. I pity for our national game more than anything else. While our boys have to go on a strike for meager 25000, the buffoons at the helm runaway with the loot. Can’t remember another nation which is so indifferent and disrespectful towards its national game. Those who still believe Suresh Kalmadi should not be hanged on the nearest lamp post please raise their hands.

 

Where is our sports minister Ajay Maken? While his last evening Tweet urging everyone to support our team was commendable, just want to ask this. While Doordarshan can live telecast a useless piece of cricket match from down-under, why no live telecast of the Hockey match going in our country? What the hell is going around here; someone please clarify me right away? Why DD blacked out? Our national team playing our national game, fighting for a spot in the Olympics and our national broadcaster have no interest in telecasting it. Heavens, I don’t have words to describe such felony of obnoxious amnesia. Hope we won’t have a repetition of it in future as promised by Mr. Maken.

In the meantime – Three big cheers to our Hockey team. Bravo!!, you made all of us proud. Keep the good work and concentrate a little on our defense, skillful usage of the free hits and center half and who knows we might just win the Olympics gold after 32 years; exactly as I have assured Michael Kindo (father of a very good friend of mine James) a member of the 1975 World Cup winning team, that he will see it happening again.

 

To rectify the mistake a little, on behalf of an entire nation and few rascal officials I beg an apology from our Hockey team for treating them so badly for decades together and in return these guys have always kept our Tricolor high. Hats off to you Boys and hope you guys would forgive us for our mistakes!! Watch out London, here comes the real juggernaut; tackle it if you can.

The Huge Governance Deficit

Dr. Manmohan Sing is fast losing the plot. Whether it is by design or accidental is a debate still to be carried out, I as a voter and citizen of this country losing my confidence in the installed government at the center, equally at fast rate if not more.
 

Since Dr. Sing took charge for the second time (or was he forced again) everything that he or his elite ministers have put their hands into has turned into apocalypse quicker than the plot of any Rohit Shetty movie. Again if that is also accidental or by design to felicitate mass loot is another thing which surely can and should be debated upon. From 2G auction (well that is from UPA-1 era) to CWG national shame (even the seeds of this hogwash were planted during UPA-1 as well), it is only examples of complete failure at governance and democratic processes that one finds as memorabilia of the current regime. During a period of three years all that we see are scams of monumental magnitude getting unearthed with responsible (at least expected to be) ministers thrown behind bar at alarming regularity. Every possible government institutions are manhandled and tricked upon for personal safety and nefarious intentions.

From CVC to CBI; from RTI to even our CEC office, everything is attempted at degrading the grandeur of such constitutional institutions for individual or party gain. And yet we every time have to hear the never fathomed excuse of coalition politics by our helpless Prime-Minister. Rather seeing credible steps being taken to punish the culprits, we see the stalwarts of the ruling party covering up the mess by their self-deduced zero loss theorems. None seems to take up the responsibility and be answerable to the nation for the mismanagement of the governing frameworks. The best that we see as an effort to address the growing concerns, is to call on a press conference and blame it on the six years rule of NDA government. No accountability whatsoever on the part of our elected representatives but only convenient lies and scapegoats handed out as part of explanation.

 

Is this complete lack of ideas and knowhow on how to run a nation or there is a lack of interest in running a government since seven years is a way too much time for one to get fed up with the monotonicity? The more one observes an average minister of the current government the more one gets a feeling that governance is least in the radar of all those who matter. It is all about covering one loot or the other or creating one mess or the other on daily basis. No questions asked; no answers delivered. This is not governing but like a bunch of schoolboys playing a game of cricket. The owner of the bat has all the say and usually goes to his home with his bat after getting fed up of prolonged batting. Dr. Sing must be thankful to be in India and that too heading the government. Had it been a private organization, he must have lost his job a long time back.

 

While there are a million starting points, the best among the lot is the 2G auction. Way too much amount is looted in the endeavor and yet complete non-action on the part of our government. The chief perpetrator A. Raja (though I am ready to believe Jesus Christ died of over drinking but not Raja being the sole hand behind the loot) was never questioned, let alone being acted upon for a good couple of years. It is the relentless media coverage and a howling opposition that made the government wake up from its deep slumber and take notice of the growing dissent. As a cover up, the master craftsman Kapil Sibal invented his unique ZERO loss theorem and blame it straight faced on the media for creating unnecessary ripples. Yet still, Raja could have his way, hadn’t the Apex court acted at the nick of time. It is only when Supreme Court showed their displeasure did Raja was arrested and put behind bars. But little did anyone understands, that Raja is least of the problem. The real problem is the loot. Where is the money that is siphoned off? No steps what so ever been taken to recover the money from the thugs yet and in all likelihood a case like 2G would be allowed to die its own death in time to come. It is only a matter of time that we will again see the same set of robbers laughing thrir way to the banks.

 

CWG is another instance which showed government’s complete disinterest in curbing corruption. The massive loot in the name of national pride was getting orchestrated right under the nose of the government and surprisingly yet none in the power circle had any clue whatsoever on this. It again needed a customary exposer of the media that the dirt of CWG started flowing openly on our street roads. As usual a great cover up effort went behind the curtains to come up with another ZERO loss theorem. Before Mr. Sibal could table this new theorem, CBI for the first time seemed like acting on their own and arrested Kalmadi. Nothing much after that as we now see Kalmadi as a free man and seen laughing all over the Pune city on a topless car. But again Kalmadi is not the real problem, but the loot and the bigger whales of this CWG ocean as I am double sure the stature of Kalmadi in this loot is nothing more than a baby Dolphin. Surprising was when Manish Tiwari even attributed the CWG loot to NDA since those were the guys who bided for the game. Just wondering why don’t Congress blames Adam & Eve for eating that forbidden apple and founding something called the human race which seems to be the root cause of every damn problem?

 

Look at how the gray heads handled the appointment of CVC. Going against the dictate and an opposing opposition party representative, they installed a person with some questionable track record of indulging in multi crore Palmoline oil scam as the primary corruption watchdog of the nation. A person who have cases of corruption filed in courts get to work as the CVC of the nation, is as good as employing highway robbers as the security head of a bank. Isn’t it? Not for the howling media again, the government could have easily got away with this as well. P. J. Thomas was asked to leave the post (which he was initially arrogant to abide by) when the courts questioned the procedure and idea behind having corrupt people installed to check the corruption itself.

 

Handling of Anna Hazare and Baba Ramdev are instances which exposes the complete bankruptcy of ideas on the part of the government. People who were genuinely fighting to have a corruption free nation were painted as villains for obvious reasons by our Government. People like Digvijay Sing even went ahead with their name calling spree. Along with Anna Hazare the government conveniently cheated an entire nation not once but twice. When the time was for some concrete action, game changer ideas were thrown at the nation at the last minute amongst the heavy whistling of bootlickers. Scapegoats in the form of Delhi Police were put in front of us while real decision (or Hara-kiri) makers were seen running away from the question-answer platform. And at the end of the day we are yet to see a strong Lokpal bill that was promised to the nation by none other than the PM himself. Looking at the trend I am sure the bill would never be passed in budget session or for that matter ever till some court of the country doesn’t pulls up the government for their non-action on this.

 

Even the anxiety of the government on its own image is evident from the actions that people like Kapil Sibal are mulling to take. On the name of defamatory gestures and national ethos being at stake, the government is busy censoring all the networking sites of the world. If the idea of such curbing down of one’s fundamental rights is not deplorable enough then the explanations given in for of such bizarre move certainly is. For a party like Congress, installing quota in the name of religion is not a threat to the society and social harmony but random people blogging or twitting on cyberspace is. Along with mis-governance, our government has long forgotten the art of sensible and sensibility. Looking at the logic less steps of our government one can only sit and ask himself – ‘If as a nation we can’t even sustain our own criticisms then how we going to protect ourselves from external enemies’?

 

The open brazenness in defying the rules of the land is another attribute that the ministers of the present government seem to have mastered at. When the Election Commissioner asked Salman Khursheed to abide the by the moral code of conduct, the union law minister rather decided to show his thumb and went ahead mimicking the EC openly. When such absurd behavior from a union minister is seldom expected, the Congress party started to cover this vehemence as well. In the name of party manifesto (as if it is bigger than the constitution) the absolute disregard towards constitutional posts is washed off. It didn’t stopped there as it is alleged that the intelligentsia at the government are even conspiring to clip the wings of EC for once and all that there would be none left to question the open violation of democratic guidelines. Hope some sense would prevail and people would refrain from digging their own graves at so alarming speed.

   

The instances are many. The convenience shown in ducking issues which cast a question mark on the ethics and value system of the government is of uncountable numbers. The general trend is to sleep over uncomfortable issues till a point either it becomes too stinking to suppress by sprinkling deodorant or our Apex court takes a serious objection to the scheme of things or the modos-operandi. Why only our government acts when they get a wrap on their knuckles? Why it is the Supreme Court time and again has to direct how a sensible and elected government should function. Why can’t a reelected government under the able leadership of Dr. Manmohan Sing can’t understand the basis trends of governance; good or bad is a separate issue in itself? Guess, time for some early midterm polls I guess!!

The Angry Old Bollywood

Do I have anything to say? If at all I had anything till yesterday, it is no more needed now. Time and again we see our so called heroes of the reel try to be one in real life and end up exercising their non-deserving celebrity status to manhandle random individuals out of the blue; just to show why they are a cult above and somewhat have a freehand in taking the law of the land in their hands and yet not be questioned of their scoundrel behavior.
 

The latest punching hero is the spoilt brat of a complete gentleman called the Late Tiger Pataudi. In a bizarre incident of recklessness, the junior Nawab of Pataudi was all but up in arms to show his physical prowess to innocent diners sitting beside his table. Against a simple complain of making too much noise while dining with few perpetual mentally retard women in the form of Malaika Khan and Kareena Kapoor, Saif Ali Khan thought of displaying his unparalleled attribute of being a complete disgrace to humanity and social behavior; he decided to land a punch or two on the complainant, so much so that it ended up breaking few cartilage of the poor man. So obnoxious the behavior that I am told Colors have decided to drop the Big Boss from their channel for just realizing there are bigger insane goats in real life than what their show has depicted till yet.

 

This calls for some introspection. No not for the rabid mongrels of our Bollywood as they don’t have enough brain to introspect even; but we ourselves. Aren’t we in open conclusion should slap ourselves publicly for garlanding rascals like Saif Ali Khan with the tag of a celebrity and giving them a freehand to take the law in their hands? The notion that each worthless creature of our Bollywood carry about them being a notch above an average mortal for they having a rare courage of stripping themselves in front of the camera, has gone a long way to let these losers to behave the way they are behaving off late. Also the money that they get, which in a way is sucked out of our wallets plays another vital role in making an insane out of entities who in probability look like humans. Honestly, tolerating the tantrums of outright drivel like Saif Ali Khan is more disparaging than paying our taxes through our nose to a Highway robber and yet have to acknowledge that we were robbed in daylight, in the form of filing our tax returns.

 

Let’s look at the latest jibe of yet another Bollywood hero at tarnishing the law-and-order of the land. While dining with a couple of females who were more seen almost topless than otherwise, the noise level created by the group was unbearable to may; including the NRI businessman dinning beside. When the complain came forward against the acidic behavior of the group to mend their ways to be termed as civilized, the hero of the screen sprang upon and pounced on the innocent who dared to question their freehand in becoming a nuisance for the society at large. Punches flown right across the restaurant lobby of Taj Hotel; ending up leaving the poor aggrieved with a broken nose. If onlookers were to be believed then the brawl was of some magnitude and to confirm this, one can only look at the latest photograph of Saif sporting a torn out shirt doing the rounds. Goodness!! A perfect role model for all who always envisaged the term hero; someone whom we can look up for inspiration. And boy didn’t we have perfect inspirational material at our disposal? A person who takes the law in his hand at the drop of a hat and yet we shamelessly still address him as a hero? I would rather prefer calling Ravindra Jadeja a world class all-rounder. Trust me, even the rowdies living in slums are better off with their civic sense when it comes to social mingling.

 

Now the question arises – why our Bollywood guys are so sordid with their civic sense? Saif is only one of the many cases that we have come across over the years. Pioneer in manufacturing boloney is a certain Salman Khan. His records have etched so many golden words in Bollywood raucous history that he could easily be conferred with a knighthood. First was the notorious instance of drunken driving where he ran over hapless homeless sleeping on the footpath. While I would have loved to see the idiot being booked under homicide he was somewhat let off the hook and rather booked under culpable homicide not amounting to murder. The infamous case of personal threats being issued by this jughead to Vivek Oberoi to stay away from Aishawrya or else his big brothers staying in Dubai would came calling, is easily another example of Mafiosi that we shouldn’t have forgotten ever. Heavens!! What the police were doing then? Can’t the scalawag be apprehended and be roughed up inside the lock up for publicly admitting of having brotherly friendship with Interpol red corner notice issued individuals? While the media conveniently side stepped these open vehemence they keep on repeating how Salman Khan turned a holy cow after opening an NGO with the name ‘Being Human’.

 

Now look at a certified traitor named the so called King Khan. At the outset let me admit, I don’t expect anything more or better from traitors. Yet still, expecting a simple human behavior is not a big ask. God only knows how many individuals this arrogant piece of shit has manhandled in his life. At least I remember three such instances, including the latest of his slaps landing straight on the cheeks of Farha Khan’s husband. No qualms about the latest martial art prowess though as the clowns can very well fight among themselves and can go to hell, for all that I care. But this annoys a great lot when the fight spills into the society involving innocent onlookers.

 

So why our reel heroes are so volatile with their characters which is completely tangent to what they are been depicted on screen? They slap people at random; they bring up a fight with average citizens for no whim or reason; they rape their maids as a matter of fact; they show the middle finger to the laws that been outlined by our system and even they hobnob with stamped enemies of the nation so blatantly. Why such erratic behavior against the standard guidelines of defining human and human behavior. Why our Bollywood stars are not much different from that congregation of street dogs who fight day-in and day-out? No not the Khujli wale Kutte but the fighting Kutte.

   

Is it the undeserving money and celebrity status gone inside their vacuum head? Was the false belief that, just because the audience cheer full throat taking the roof of the theater along for their actions on screen, they have the license to repeat the spectacle in public life? Or was it that we as a nation marred by such blind worshiping of complete grimy humans lacking notoriously of any social and cultural values is the real culprit in encouraging such nuisances to go on and on? Even though the reasons could be way too many there is at least one solution to this problem. And the solution is - It is time we think about our antisocial heroes and throw these social disgraces out of our worshiping modules. The sooner we do, the better it would be for the nation at large.

What The EC Can Do Now?

Now that a constitutional institution is mocked more than Pakistan as a democracy, it is about time something is done about it. First it was a show of clear disrespect to the guidelines laid down decades ago, Salman Khurshid went ahead announcing sops for UP voters in the form of some minority quota, which amounted to violation of the code of conduct. Taking cognizance of such vehemence EC aptly asked Mr. Khurshid to shut up and behave as a senior politician, more so when he is the union law minister. But a mere warning seldom has ever deterred a true brave heart from the land of Bhagat Sings. Has it? So nonchalance was at its peak when the law minister himself forgot to abide the law and went ahead doing the same announcement a few days later, which is in a way showing a thumb to what EC has to say. EC along with his pair of outdated pair of glasses can go to hell for all that matters.
  

What followed after that public slapping of EC can be a shameful episode in our democracy. Rather acting tough on the violator, EC behaved like a cry baby and landed at the door steps of the president sobbing profusely with his complain letter. Conveniently enough, to suppress the unnecessary Halla-Ballo, in parallel, Salman Khurshid asked for an apology from EC. As if that is what precisely the EC was waiting for, he immediately announced the matter as closed and resolved and in all probability seemed more than happy with a mere apology from a defaulter, who perhaps has insulted our great democracy. As history is a proof, examples set the tone for the future mavericks. Hence looking at EC’s action or the lack of it on the whole Salman Khurshid farce, another from the Congress camp named Beni Prasad Varma, pretty much did what Khurshid did earlier. Same disrespect for the law and rule books with little or no respect for an institution of the stature of Election Commissioner.

 

For sure there are words not yet defined in the dictionary to describe such mayhem. This is so disgraceful when our elected representatives don’t seem to realize the value of democracy and its ethos. More than the actions of the two ministers, it is the setting in of a new trend and the complete clownish response of our EC that seems little dangerous. I am not sure of the compulsions or reasons why Mr.Quraishi chickened out when he was needed to handover some exemplary punishment to Khurshid for breaking the law so openly and going against the dictate of the EC. For a certainty this complete non-action made one thing clear – You can mock an institution like the EC of India and it is just an apology which will transform you back to a holy cow again. This precise window gazing and looking like lost in the sea attitude of EC against Khurshid did gave courage to jokers like Beni Prasad Sharma to shamelessly strip the reputation of EC so blatantly and openly.

 

More shameful is the realization that the position Mr. Qurashi is occupying has some astounding no-nonsense individuals honoring at some point of the history. I am sure, had T. N. Sesan been at the helm, no bloody politician would have dared to do even a tenth of what both Salman Khurshid and Beni Prasad Varma did. Because, that man never alone threatened but promptly followed it up with befitting examples. Had there been Sesan, the elections at the constituencies where both of these clowns ashamed the nation would have been long scrapped.

 

Since the reputation is all but lost and the entire CEC office looks more mentally imbalanced than the housemates of Big-Boss, what the EC can do to resurrect their situation and gain the lost grounds, if at all they want to? Perhaps the entire team is clueless and it becomes more than obligatory for people like us to furnish our tips to bail out Mr. Quraishi before he gets slapped publicly at so alarming regularity. So here are my tips (at least 10 of them) for revival.

• Now that there is absolutely no response to the letter on Khurshids cavalier from our president (for obvious reasons) as she is too busy arranging for an anticipatory bail for her son about to be arrested in connection with some one crore unaccountable money, what EC can do regarding Beni Varma’s nonsense? Perhaps write to Obama this time around.

• If the non-action was forced down the throat of EC by powers that be and ordered him to chicken out then the best way to wash off the guilt is self-torture. Mr.Quraishi can go inside the washroom and bolt the door (well every one bolt the washroom door anyway) and slap himself like the way that is shown in one of the Tata motor’s latest advertisements.

• Ohh, I am so happy for Dr. Manmohan Sing now. At least he henceforth won’t feel alienated in this world full with humans and humans only. For a change EC has this great opportunity at hand to write to our PM and let him know that he is not the only one with his misery of ‘being needed but never accounted of’. Rather writing futile long mails to our already sold out president, Mr. Quraishi can write to our PM instead – ‘Sir, you are not the only honorable one. People don’t listen to me either.’

• In contrary, he can go ahead and announce the dictate against all Hindu candidates of UP to not campaign for the election henceforth as they are communal just being Hindu. That would further please the bosses in Shastri Bhawan and who knows Mr. Quraishi might be gifted with the presidential post for his great service to the nation once the cook leaves her position post July.

• He can get in touch with Anna Hazare and convince him to take up his case next time he decides to fast. I mean, this could be the biggest atrocity that can be meted out to a government official holding such a neutral esteemed position.

• Write to Harvard to induct a case study on how one shouldn’t screw up its democratic framework by treating their Election organizers head as a regrettable instance of erectile dysfunction.

• Might call up his counterpart in Pakistan (if they have one) and mock him of his pathetic situation for self-satisfaction.

• Call one of the paid news channels and their paid journalists and utter ‘Val Hopons Var hopon’ and threaten to quite, even though his quitting or sticking onto his position shamelessly doesn’t really matter much for anyone.

• Request ACP Pradyumna to investigate his case with his team of break all doors of the world and prepare a 4283 pages of report which no bloody human would ever care to read through.

• And last but not the least – just leave his gifted post for being from the minority and drive a Taxi in Mumbai. At least Raj Thakray men won’t bash him up in fear of losing some minority votes.

Now that a ten pointer from me, can I ask for a grad dinner from you Mr. Quraishi? At least a breakfast, like what Rahul Gandhi arranged for all the sold out jurnos in his payroll to further cover up the mess that UPA is piling up for last seven odd years?

Open Letter To Mumbaikars!!

Dear Mumbaikars, 
 

That’s what you like yourselves to be called. Don’t you?

Let me tell this; you were again disappointing. No I am not complaining on how in the name of Juhu Beach you allowed Ritesh Deshmukh to marry Genelia, but your repeated disinterest towards something that the nation, the city of Mumbai, you guys yourselves along with the numerous Bhais roaming around carrying Desi Kattas or Rampuris in every street corner could benefit. I wouldn’t been in the complainant box if it had been that one of case but it is the alarming regularity of your complete objection to cast your votes as if, if you do then you either would be subjected to being molested by Mayawati or forced to have sex with an HIV infected prostitute, you conveniently duck it time and again. Why such consistency in your blindness towards your own fundamental rights? Yo can surely change this notorious attitude. Come on; even Rohan Gavaskar has scored an oneday half century accidentally. If Rohan can execute a miracle, you guys certainly can.

 

Coming back to the asli mudda. If the self-gloating of the attitude of so called Mumbaiaa and your nonexistent inclusiveness hasn’t shadowed your vision yet, then let me drop the bomb at your doorstep. Let’s get the records straight. If you think the statistics of the number of Panipuri walas or the Taxi drivers bashed up black and blue by a group allegedly comprising of humans known as MNS is scary enough then let me throw a scarier statistics at you. This time for the local municipal election you again miserably contributed a 43% of your entire voting constituent. Even if that is the percentage of the engineers at Infosys who can spell software correctly, it still looks meager in comparison to what our voters from the Maoist infected interior Uttar Pradesh has to offer. Even they managed to score a 60% which is equivalent to the percentage of engineers at TCS who can’t spell software correctly.

 

This is nonsense to say the least. Don’t you think so? The city which is considered the harbinger of new era intellectualism and culture and supposed to be full with individuals of such brilliance that it could make many Nobel laureates throw their prizes in their city gutters out of shame; can’t understand the value of exercising their most important fundamental right? Is that complete indifference towards one’s responsibilities or too much lack of sensibility? Or shouldn’t I have asked this at the first place after seeing Rakhi Shawant for some time in various notorious platforms? In whichever way, the answers for me at least are farfetched. The last time we had our general election you guys had a pathetic number of 46% of the constituents that thought it is important to cast their votes. While that number itself should have forced many of you to boycott eating Bhel-Puri till the next general election, you guys decided to break your own record instead. That is so interesting, No?

 

While random people from the city give lectures to the world (including Pakistan, Afghanistan and Kalmadi) on how one should respect his/her responsibilities towards the nation are seen believing a beer bar in Lonavla is just the right place to be on the voting day to pass out an utterly boring off day. That is so tangent to what one preaches and ending up doing something entirely different.
 

What that flummoxes me, is the absence of any apparent reason for such behavior. Just when I conclude to blame it on your lack of inclusiveness, there the scenes of the mob carrying a lightened candle each and marching in unison (of course without the song Ayega..Ayega) stops me going further. You guys have already engaged in more number of candle light vigils than the rest of the marches anywhere in the world put together. Didn’t you? So the last thing that you guys must be lacking is coming together for a cause. But where is that force in conviction when it comes to casting your votes and why I don’t see people thronging the poll booth in such numbers? Or is it, a cause which has no scope of a candle march is not a cause worthy enough to acknowledge? While you guys can gather in lakhs as early as five in the evening near the Gateway Of India when the designated march is scheduled to start only past eight, you guys were almost always has to be dragged out of your beds on voting day; that too when it 2 in the afternoon. While women cutting social circle were seen sporting a kilo of makeup with a good 750 gram of it being their lipsticks alone and busy in burning N number of candles even before the sun sets in; they are nowhere to be seen (with or without makeup) near the polling booth. Why that enthusiasm vaporizes for real causes? Or sporting lipstick inside a polling booth is banned by our Election Commissioner? Mr.Quarashi, could you please clarify this?

 

Just look at the number of wax you guys burnt post 26/11, so much so that it shoot up the global wax price index by three folds across the planet. Even people travelled to places like Pune to get hold of their favorite color lipstick to make the great occasion of some candle burning a grand success. When the theatrics in front of the Taj Hotel along with that placard showing ‘Enough Is Enough’ is commendable, it certainly is not when Mumbai went to polls within a week of that nasty incident. Post that grandeur after 26/11 candle burning, when all thought the number of people who would be attacking the poll booths to cast their votes would be so enormous that the poll officials would have critical shoulder operation for just inking their fingers; you guys ended up with a shameful 46% turnout. While it was expected of the vocal Mumbaikars to set an example for the rest of the universe, including the aliens who don’t vote in their own planet, you guys conveniently slept through the day on pretext of the hot and humid conditions. That is so bizarre, won’t you guys think so? Pioneers in bursting their vocal chords for national issues were individuals like Sobha De. While Sobha could have taken out some time from her soft porn writing endeavor to cast her vote, she chickened out and nowhere to be seen, at least for next three days. Why so hypocritical? Or hang-on, Am I missing something? Is it having an inked finger doesn’t go down well with your style statement?

 

And what the hell is that Amchi Mumbai nonsense, if it had any sense ever to begin with? Belongingness doesn’t come with only narrating your pledge and responsibility but with credible examples following your talk. Before shouting Amchi Mumbai for every damn reason, even while having sex; all of you need to ponder what you have done to call it your Mumbai. Other than loitering the Juhu Beach and shitting here, there and everywhere, what credible that one has done to vouch for such claims? Well Raj Thakray is excluded from answering these as I am for sure confident that he hasn’t done anything and he shouldn’t waste even a second in muscling his gray cells to think of one.

 

Guys, be sensible and realize there are far more important and better things to do than going for random candle light vigils for no apparent reasons or arranging flash mobs to dance like eunuchs in a marriage party. Top of the list in ‘Things to ponder’ is to resurrect the pathetic record of not voting ever. Or else let me tell you, it would be really unfortunate if Apex court in response to a PIL, orders to slap random Mumbaikars left-right-and-center the moment they open their mouth to talk on national interest and issues. Hope we won’t encounter that day ever. Or should we request EC to arrange voting in Mumbai during night time only and allow each of the voters to carry a lighted candle inside the booth? Could that approach increase the vote percentage since you Mumbaikars would have that sense of Dejavu like going for a candle-light vigil, not to cast your votes?

By the way where were the big mouths shouting for a corruption free India when Anna was staging his fast there? 

 

Warm Regards

-Someone who hasn’t yet participated in a single Candle-light vigil.

Members Of The Lecherous Assembly (MLA)

Honestly, I am struggling hard for words to describe what our elected representatives did inside the Karnataka assembly. I can’t agree more to the grey head who said ‘Politics is the last refuge for the scoundrels’ and boy look at the set that we are blessed with. Scarier is when one of the pervert happens to be the Women & Child welfare minister of the state.
  

While the promptness in tendering their resignations after such act of vandalism could be judged befitting, the issue of the moral degradation among our elected representatives still remains a concern. As to why the ministers decided to entertain themselves with some porn when a serious discussion was going on the floor, remains a mystery, our political class has reacted to the incident in a marred way. As if leaving these two the rest all are sacrosanct like Gautama Buddha; all in one vein pounced on the two culprits for that cleansing process to start. The ways our media and the intellectual circle of Twitter who always believe they have an epiphany that the entire universe, including the aliens must know behaved, is funnier even. How the fishing of one thug makes the rest as clean as Dettol was at its best with who’s-who of the world had their opinion on the issue.

 

While most that commented on the clowns in secrete might be wishing to have that clip in their cellphones, the brazenness shown in condemning the apprehended was hypocritical. As if watching porn is the biggest crime one can commit as per our penal code, individuals with astounding record of engaging in monumental loot or manslaughter at will were seen objecting the men who thought adoring some naked bodies in their handheld is a better option than to heed much on what the useless speaker has to say. Even people with some credible record of investing a fortune to pay off the Uzbek or Ukrainian prostitutes every month, were also at the forefront in issuing their displeasure of the act. Of all the people it was Lalu Yadav who has to offer a lecture on moral values. Really? Holy Cows all-around us and we only falsely ashamed ourselves for being the most corrupt and immoral society for decades, I guess.

 

All in all, what surprises me is – Why our political class is so self-destructive? Why they get engaged in acts and actions which even a kid attending some mentally retard school can figure out? Be it getting caught with their pants down and hands in the cookie jar or voyeur camera catching them hobnobbing with call girls inside a PWD guest house or majestic examples of the likes of N.D.Tiwari who even didn’t spared Rajbhawan from the purview of his lecherous endeavor. It is always a mission at shooting themselves at the foot, or even on forehead. Why they always fight for their life to keep on reminding the type of scoundrels that we have elected to represent us?

 

When the proportions and problems that an average Indian faces for daily survival are so colossal that at times we tend to even forget our own spouses; we certainly won’t fancy much beyond a couple of months to remember if one from our political class looted almost half of the nation or raped all females of his constituency. The issue regarding our corrupt and criminal political class doesn’t remain an issue after a week and becomes as extraneous as development is for Mayawati. In fact we all have a very thin memory and we tend to forget the past quicker than an average Bollywood character forgets after an airplane falls on his head. So here is the thing – If our political class would come out in public every three months and slap themselves, we will forgive them of their sins and probably would go ahead and build up a Facebook application to play ‘Who slapped himself best’ and be happy on our scores. But no; our politicians don’t get the gist of this simplicity to remain holy cows in our eyes and continue to remain disorganized in committing hara-kiri every ten days. If that is not enough, the way they turn cranky and issue statements to defend their crime once they are exposed makes comprehending the words of Jadu from Koi Mil Gaya an easier option. Even Mahendra Sing Dhoni made sense a couple of times after the huge losses in Australia.

 

Look at the reactions post the porngate saga. While most of them could be golden tattooed and stored in the presidential library as a book, the one that standout among those is when someone explained – ‘They were only watching porn, not doing it’. Goodness, are we even expecting that someday or what? Perhaps that would be the day when we would fire a couple of nuclear arsenal at ourselves and be done away with the mess and let the survivors start from the scratch. If you think this is enough then just look at what a senior Apex court lawyer T.S. Tulsi has to say. People who watch porn are less likely to pounce on women in real life. Heavens!!, an earthshaking theorem in all sense. Albert Einstein and Newton can very well go to hell with their inventions. Is the Nobel prize committee listening?

That said, looking at our politicians of last three decades, we shouldn’t surprise ourselves too much to know they even engage in enjoying porn inside the assembly. When they blatantly loot the nation publicly, then what is the big deal in digging into some porn inside a room? It is only that they were exposed now, or else the methodology employed to serve the nation through a clip or two of porn can easily date back to a decade at least. The pillar of garbage that our political class was piling for some time was bound to give in some day. The fan didn’t fell on Sarad Pawar’s head out of the blue. Our political class hit it with so much shit that it just refused to stand it anymore and it is only a coincidence that Pawar Bhau was at the receiving end. While at least one scoundrel (could be the biggest) was slapped away nonchalantly, there are many in the fray and let me assure you with some confidence, even a national slapping mission would easily fail delivering justice to each and every rascal. We might end up with having a sore palm at the end of the day but there would still be a number of cheeks left untouched. So mammoth is the collection of colorful creatures elected (or booth ragged) by us.

 

So the bottom-line; we shouldn’t blow too much hot air for porngate. We rolled on the floor laughing thinking about it, and tweeted a hell lot on it. We took the porn viewing saga a source of entertainment in our otherwise dull life and it better be left there. Let the law takes its course from here on, if at all our law takes any course when it comes to our elected class and let the so called party high commands seal the fate of the jokers. We better concentrate on the tri-series going in the racist land, where at least we are looking like winning a match or two accidentally. By the way where is Manish Tiwari? Just wanted to ask – Did he precisely meant these two guys when he said ‘Elected and Electable’?

Sonia Gandhi, The New Cry Baby!

I just want to imagine this. Salman Khusrhid like an obedient servant comes along with a bunch of photographs of the Batla House encounter and produces them at her majesty’s feet for her knowledge. Digvijay Sing sitting beside and closely inspecting madam’s reactions so that he can issue another spectacular statement praising his boss. All hell breaks loose then, when madam starts sobbing uncontrollably, much to the dismay of both servants. Before anyone can react, madam urges Salman Khurshid to not show these atrocious pictures to her ever again and asks both of the men to get in touch with Manmohan Sing, provided he himself is not weeping already for being at the helm and yet not having enough power or authority to even scratch his own balls. Ask him at once to start a probe on it; still a profusely sniveling madam, I am told, ordered.

 

Boy, isn’t the screenplay straight from a third graded Kamal Khan starrer Bhojpuri movie? The emotions that the alleged weeping of madam carried were evident from the tone that Khurshid employed to narrate the soft corner of madam towards the people of Azamgarh. Whether madam did in realty wept inconsolably or not is suspicious; but for sure Salman Khurshid looked like crying while narrating the incident.

 

Now that the oration at self-humiliation is accomplished and some shooting on the foot job is done, it is for all of us to ponder if the attempt at setting a new world record in bootlicking going to hamper Khursid’s prospect of enjoying the clout he enjoys just being from the minority community or would enhance for showing his loyalty towards his Mai-Baap. The timing couldn’t have been any bad either for Khursid as he is surely in a mess for announcing a 9% quota for the minorities which led to a lot of people including the poll panel of UP upset like one becomes seeing Lungi clad individuals running mayhem in the nation. As expected a strong rap on the knuckles came along shaking Khursid inside out, so much so that there was an evident lack of sensibility when he stood in the platform and announced how Sonia cried like a baby snatched of his feeding bottle after seeing the atrocity meted out at a bunch of innocent Kalashnikov wielding and rocket launcher firing individuals.

 

While the necessity of such a dialogue delivery was completely uncalled for, the thing that hit me when I first heard of Khursid’s spectacle is – ‘Why Salman Khursid is issuing statements for a change? Is Digvijay Sing on leave? ’ Right people must be allowed to carry out their job and Khursid must not have attempted at delivering nonsense, which is a domain clearly belonging to Diggi Raja alone. Hope our law minister had his bitter lesson on the semantics of the rules when it comes to vomiting outright nonsense and the realization that beyond a point, even the pet project of votebank appeasement is not much appreciated by clowns at the top of the Congress food chain.

 

Even though Khursid might be getting slapped while I write this for his metabolically mollified attempt at overdoing his job, we tend to forget the inherent truth in the statement. Now here is the thing – Why Sonia cried, if at all she cried? Was it for the police personnel who unnecessarily died or was it for the damage done to the property? Or was it for the terrorists who were killed in the encounter? If the cry of anguish (which only Khurshid seems to have witnessed) was for the damaged furniture of the house then one can still praise the UPA chairperson for being highly considerate towards material safety. But if it is not the damaged Almirah that made Sonia cry her heart out, then it looks a little dicey.

 

If the cry was for the terrorists who died and which lead to few permanent votes for the party being lost forever then it becomes an obvious condemnable gesture. Being in a position of power and when we have more and more terror attacks year per year, then one can’t tolerate guys showing their sympathy for the departed scoundrels for whatever reason it might be. Now if the cry was for the innocent deaths as the encounter was a fake one (time and again reiterated by the motor mouth Digvijay Sing), then the cry seems even scarier. While all Congies (including their pet dogs) shout from the rooftop for yet to be proved fake encounter in Gujarat, then what about their own Delhi government. If Gujarat government along with Modi is to be blamed for that alleged fake encounter and be hanged on the nearest available lamp post then what about Delhi government and Shiela Dixit? Where was the motor mouth when madam Shiela was cajoling the wife of Mr. Sharma and was shedding gallons of crocodile tear? Why the motor mouth didn’t show same vehemence and demand for Shiela’s ouster, if he is that confident of the shootout as a fake encounter? In either way (best known to Salman Khursid only) he wanted to paint Sonia in some kind of canvas, it has done damage to a great extent and no wonder Congress was quick to refute Khursid’s sentimental dialogue delivery. If at all Sonia would be crying tonight, then perhaps for having such jokers not only surrounding her but also talking on her behalf.

 

Little one know the spectacle was only unrevealing when all thought it to be over otherwise and time for some funny tweeting to start. The icing on the cake was when Diggi bounced back seeing someone else doing his job and put his foot once again in his mouth and announced Khursid’s mawkish gesture as baseless. That was quite funny to see the smart lieutenants not sure if their commanding officer in fact carried or not. And I would be the last person to be surprised if some face saving exercise comes to floor and the poor cook (No not Pratibha Patil. She is our president now) is blamed for cutting onions at the nick of time which brought tears on the eyes of her majesty.

 

All-in-all, the whole farce of Sonia crying or not crying has some close correlation to the dual India theorem of Rahul Gandhi, which he invented during his relentless effort of increasing poverty tourism in India with his guests from the west. For sure there are two India, one at least where Sonia cried.

Bharat Ratna – Do We Require Any Such Award?

I am all for honoring our citizens for their exemplary contribution to the society and the nation at large. I am all for showing the greatest of gratitude towards a certain Mother Teresa or A.P.J Abdul Kalam, looking at what they have done for the nation. It is the politics that surrounds our nation’s greatest civilian award of late is what flummoxes me a great deal.
 

Any great nation that we see coexisting with us on this planet has their own institutions to rectitude their national heroes in one way or the other. But there is always honesty in any such award, provided you are not one of the nations like Somalia, Colombia or Mexico, where either there is no such award existing or at best been garlanded to extreme crooks from the field of holocaust warlords or drug mafias. Grabriel Garcia Marquez is an exception and lets not debate on that. While rest of the world (expect Pakistan) remain transparent and apolitical with their national honor, there is a catch when it comes to India. Here we are entirely tangent to the way the rest of the world treat their national gallantry recognition. We are highly political when it comes to Bharat Ratna and throw it at random individuals with little or no credibility to be even considered for such prestigious award, let alone been awarded one.

 

When the whole thing started in 1954, we honored three of our best citizens that we can ever aspire to have in our nation. C.Rajagopalchari, Dr. Sarvapalli Radhakrishnan and C.V. Raman are the first trio who got this award and quite deservingly so. If you are about to say – wow, that is a great start, then I will urge you to check your emotions. What followed with our Bharat Ratna after that was harakiri of highest order. When many quote, ‘The end is as good as the beginning itself’, we seems to have defied that quote as well. While the whole idea was to say a quite thank you to our real heroes, it has gone rotten and a platform for political Bhagidari lately. The award which has some inherent greatness laced with it is seen being used rampantly at self-gloating and self-patting so that people can remember you for long and some third graded general knowledge book sold on the footpaths near Palika Bazar can have an honorable mention of your name in one of their recycled paper pages. Or at best if you have enough clout in the power circles then you can make way for your name to land in one of those pathetic text books that we force our kids to read and enjoy that wrong sense of dejavu.

 

A simple glance at the people who have won it and the many of the deserving who were asked to go for a walk as they were/are not sufficing any political gain for one political party or the other, tells a great deal on how sacrosanct and genuine our highest civilian award is. If neglecting the true deserving were not enough, we have awarded entities after decades they deserved, which in a way looks more like an insult than honoring. Don’t believe me? Then for an argument, I can only ask you to Google the year that a certain Subash Chandra Bose was awarded with this honor and that too after whom.

 

Let’s take Rajiv Gandhi’s felicitation as an example. While I still scramble for reasons good enough to award a person with some questionable tainted background with such a prestigious award, I feel like slapping myself to be part of the world’s largest democracy for being denied an answer to my RTI on the precise grounds on which Rajeev was chosen to be the one. And what I had to digest for a reply? Facts can’t be shared as it subverts someone’s privacy. Really? For God’s sake, my idea was to know the criteria for such awards; not to peep someone’s washroom while he/she is taking a bath. Where is the bloody privacy when it comes to national interest?

 

If denying my right to information in a democratic country was not monumental enough, it shames me to an unbelievable extent to see our one such Bharat Ratna awardee has cases of corruption involving the national security running in various courts of India. Purist with the alibi of hiding behind legal jargons when uncomfortable questions are thrown at can argue on the ground that none of the courts is yet to convict Rajeev in either of any. I just want to pause and ask again – ‘Caesar’s wife should be above suspicion ’; isn’t it a line which just fits to our most prestigious award? How in earth we can award someone with our most sought after felicitation when we have few questions to tangle with? There can’t be smoke without fire and we certainly can’t ignore it when it comes to our national pride.

 

We went out of the track to award someone who is still engulfed by Bofors, Fair-affairs to name few and yet don’t find more worthy Prime-Ministers, who have genuinely done good for the nation are credible enough candidates. Where is the mention of Lalbahadur Shastri? Perhaps the best PM India has ever seen is yet to be even remembered on his death anniversary but at the same time we turn clownish to walk that extra mile in showering the non-deserving prestige to few others. Why not Atal Bihari Vajpayee or for that matter Dr. Manmohan Sing? They for sure are men of better substance, caliber and fortitude. Hell even why not Deve Gowda? While we can blame him for sleeping most part of his tenure, he at least hasn’t harmed the nation. Just because a certain Lalbahadur Shastri doesn’t feature in the scheme of things of Congress in their bootlicking endeavor of worshiping a particular family, we can’t ignore such a great man for this award.

 

Well, let me not explain the reasons how Subash Bose become a worthy enough candidate to win this award after Rajeev Gandhi won it; as I am still not fathom the logic behind such attempts. Hell, how can we forget our father of the nation then? Sorry Bapu, you are not worth it. Not at least till Rahul Gandhi or Robert Vadra wins one someday for sleeping in Dalit Huts more number of times than the entire Dalit community put together or siphoning a lot of money (through shady financial deals) by doing Dalali for DLF, respectively. This is so bloody unbelievable. I can still find reasons if Ritesh Deshmukh someday kicks Amitabh Bachhan out of the race to win the prestigious National Award for best actor, but not how Netaji, only came to the radar after Rajeev Gandhi. Kudos to Netaji’s nephew for refusing to accept the award citing it as an insult to the great man. That said there is one silver lining though. At least now we finally recognize that a Maj. Dhyanchand who bought laurel for us in our national game is qualified enough to be considered.

 

Not only the Bharat Ratna but the entire Padma award is also a big time farce too. Look at the random bootlickers and crony capitalists who were being awarded with this second line of awards every year. From sold out media persons to liquor barons; from pathetic hoteliers to a person who claims he can grow hair on your barren balls through homeopathy; all were being awarded with Padmas because that’s what helps the government to build a shameless clout. Be it airing paid news to cover some scam or the other or supplying of money when there isn’t much left in the bank to even buy a new pair of innerwears; these Padma awardees would be going over the hill to furnish their help and support. National pride can go to hell, if that is required.

 

While I feel disgusted to even use the word disgusting to describe how we treat our highest civilian award, I pray Sachin’s fans don’t call for my blood for this final statement of mine. Thankfully Sachin is a Hindu or else I would have been slapped with 765 Fatwas on daily basis for such atrocity. Without even mincing punctuation of it; Irrespective of his so called achievements, I don’t see him worthy enough for this award. 100 hundreds is certainly not great enough for this prestige, more so when we don’t even talk about Rakhi Shawant for having changed as many boyfriends in much lesser time than what Sachin took to score them. Isn’t she also eligible then? Hang on – On a second thought, if Rajeev Gandhi can win it then bloody anyone can; which also includes me. At least I haven’t looted my nation yet or is it precisely the first criteria for such awards?

Congress & Corruption. Is It A Synonym?

No, I didn’t come to this supposition just because our Apex court shown the doors of exit to many of the scoundrel telecom operators who were all but syndicate in the crime that A.Raja perpetrated in connivance with his bosses at Chennai and crooks of his coalition. It is rather the long encumbering dirty facts that pop up ever now-and-then (more recurrent in last couple of years or so) that forced me to believe, ‘corruption’ could very well be our national pastime and with all probability our national culture and national game as well. 
 

As if having extreme corrupts in the form of Raja or Kalmadi at the helm was not enough, today a publication in one of the Canadian daily regarding Praful Patel’s swindler avatar in selling country’s pride in the name of Air-India was for sure a huge nail in our coffin as far as self-pride and national interest is concerned. And pity, at the same time when this news made Praful wet his pants in a jittery, Rahul Gandhi along with his sister Priyanka were seen all over the place in UP vouching their pledge in curbing corruption. Couldn’t believe this (more than if scientists confirm Rakhi Shawant possesses something called brain) when the presumption in all probability that it is the Congress party which was pioneer in introducing this malice to the nation by setting proper and befitting examples at regular intervals.

 

Let’s first look at the amount that we have already drained from our treasury to accommodate the fancy of few handful looters. A simple Google on it throws a staggering ninety lakh sixty three thousand crores as the precise amount. While I can offer the liberty of seven months to you to figure out the number zeros the said amount can possibly contain, I am no way in a mood to have the looters of this go unaccountable even for a second. Just because someone who duly shared the loot with his bosses up can’t be the criteria to look the other way and let the highway robbers have their day. That is as good as allowing Adnan Sami, not only to divorce three of his previous wives (in as many months) but also allowing him to eat out half of our food reserve.

 

More than the deed of corruption, it is the manner in which the Congress always tries to cover their nefarious spectacles by blaming one and all is what nonpluses me. When 2G first broke the headlines for the sheer amount of money that was part of the siphoned amount; Congress being at the helm showed little or no reaction to even acknowledge it. let alone acting on it. I am now half convinced that the first-come first-serve apparatus is dearest to Congress. How else one can possibly justify their affinity to pigskin behind it whenever they are apprehended with even currency notes stuffed in their dhotis or clicked naked with a goat? Be it the case of hanging Afzal Guru or apportioning national assets in throw away price; it always was the First-Come First-serve methodology that took the center stage.
 

What followed right after the 2G exposer is for sure a classic example of subverting our criminal justice system, democracy, respect for people’s money and almost everything that is expected from a democratically elected government. All in the Congress camp overworked to save their skin from the 2G mess and a national campaign went around protecting the thugs so much so that we saw A.Raja being never acted upon a good year and half from the day the scam first broke out. If the complete indifference of an incumbent government towards curbing corruption was not enough, we heard excuses of astounding nature to justify the loot being of minimal category. Top in the pack of shameless excuses was our own Prime-Minister’s helpless nature over displayed time and again on how he just can’t act against the perpetrator of the ally party as it could be against the Coalition Dharma. While we are yet to hear a clarification from our PM, since when looting the nation is part of a coalition politics; we rather were honored with the bizarre zero loss theorem of Kapil Sibal. Since Raja is in jail from that day and his prime associate Sadiq Bachha committed suicide (or someone pushed him); Kapil and team running all around the place in search of another flabbergasting excuse.

 

If that was not enough then just ponder at the reactions of the dirty tricks department when a couple of days back our Apex court all but bashed the corrupt party at power to the fullest. More than feeling embarrassed and searching for avenues to hang themselves, the atrocious clowns of the party were seen groping for yet another scapegoat to bestow their fault with. When the need of the hour was to remain silent, Kapil went ahead demanding an apology from BJP instead for his party’s corruption and raps they got from none other than our highest court. When it was time for some soul searching, he rather shamelessly tried to shed away his own and his crooked party’s siphoning phenomena under the blanket of following only the policies formulated by the earlier NDA government. A holy cow. Aren't you? And what we got to hear at the end of the day for an apology? To blame BJP instead of the scoundrels who actually looted, just because it was the policy of the then NDA government that UPA religiously followed, with a tweak or two to felicitate mass robbery. Really? Since when UPA was so vehement in following the policies set by NDA? Then why not follow the ideology of building a Ram Mandir at Ayodhya, which was a pet project of NDA? Why stop even at NDA government Mr.Sibal? Why not go further and blame the British instead for laying down the policy of loot a good century back that still the Congress is following with their life? Why blame Facebook even when they are just following the policies formulated by Orkut only? Can’t have your Samosha and eat it too; that too in a democratic country Kapil. For sure, you need some tough answering to do since you decided to lead the clownish lot at the center.

 

Now look at a muddle in the name of CWG. Boy, that was a classic which even ashamed the corrupts of Somalia and Pakistan. When we as a nation were all busy listening lectures on professionalism form nations nobody knew ever existed in the world map, the team from Congress lead by a parody named Kalmadi were too busy raping the national pride publicly. And what we see for an action against the lampoons for inflicting such national shame? Well almost negligible. That was perhaps the first time that our national corruption went international and we are yet to act on the wrongdoers with some divinity. Single toilet rolls bought at a price which can even feed an average Indian village for a week, and we are yet to be delivered with justice that we deserve. Kalmadi is all but free and laughing his way to the bank on daily basis while we tax payers who lost a considerable chunk (thankfully not yet had to sell our kidneys) to buy tissues to wipe Kalmadi’s shit smeared posterior, are left drying in the sun. That is yet again another classic case of indifference of a government towards its own people who have elected them to have a freehand to loot. The only silver lining in the whole CWG mess is that we are yet to hear a ZERO loss theorem from Kapil Sibal.

 

So how we should honor such endurance of Congress party in making them a synonym for Corruption? Perhaps carry out a signature campaign to convince Oxford to change the word corruption accordingly. The long trait of dishonesty that Congress seems to have made a policy of their party since the days Pundit Nehru first sport that red rose to woo Lady Mountbatten to drop her clothes; need to be garlanded with some immediate praise. And how better it can be to give Congress a chance to wash their hands on UP treasury completely; provided Mayawati has left anything to loot there. Nonetheless, all that is required to remain sacrosanct after a daylight robbery is to come up with a shameless zero loss theorem and a worthy scapegoat to blame, at the end of the day. Mr.Sibal, have you started working on this new theorem yet or not? Skunks!!