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Thursday, March 18, 2010

Swayambar of Comedy

Team Being Cynical
Saint Valmiki must be turning in his grave and cursing himself on why he choose a Swayambar to be the litmus test for all the prospective candidates to get married to Sita. He could have chosen a simple arranged marriage, or worse a love marriage could have done. But why a Swayambar, why?. He must also be contemplating the idea of getting out of his grave and rewriting that particular part of the epic all over again. His own idea of showing the world on the very fact that at that time even girls were given the freedom to choose whom they want to marry, without any restriction or parental pressure and the prevailing women liberty, has definitely been made a mockery off late on idiot box. Thanks to one private entertainment channel which left no stones unturned in giving Valmiki some sleepless nights in his grave along with giving us a suspicion on, if actually passing the Swayambar by lord Ram through lifting the Siv Dhanu well above his head when other participants failed to move it even an inch including guys like mighty Ravana, is actually an act of bravery or not.

Where are the social, moral and cultural police, who cry with the drop of a hat. Isn't the proceddings in TV is a real set back to our culture and defying the very idea of Valmiki on why he choose Swayambar as a podium to get married Sita? Few would agree that lately the Idiot Box is getting really Idiot, specially in the evening hours. You need to be married and have a wife who is an adherent fan of Ekta Kapoor to realize this. It was somehow tolerable till the point of all those Chaal, Sazish, Dhoka between Sas-Bahu, Bhabi-Nanand, Dewrani-Jethani but these Swayambars on TV are taking a serious toll on individuals mental peace. How guys in the entertainment fraternity could conceive this idea ? You need to be real fertile to conceive such ornamental ideas, I must admit. At least there is one instance to refer on Swayambar for girls (Sita), but what about Swayambar for boys ? Is their any reference of it?

Even if the production houses are running out of fresh ideas and are done with all the Chaal, Sazish, Dhoka in every possible way involving every possible relationship in the face of the planet and are left with no option but to get married one or the other on digital media, then for God's sake do have participants who value, understand and care about Indian culture. When I say participants it includes both, the prospective candidates and the entity whose Swayambar is organized at the first place. But what we end up with is to see Drama Queens, Drug addicts organizing Swayambars for themselves along with a huge bunch of jokers lining up to get married to either the Drama Queen or the drug addict as if this is the only way left for them to get their better half.

When Rakhi Sawant got her Swayambar organized, I thought Ahh!! a watershed event in the existence of human race. The lady of controversies has finally decided to go the family way. I was sure none would come forward voluntarily to commit suicide, looking at the long history of Ms.Sawant. But I was pathetically proved wrong when I saw, actually there are a dozen fools who were ready to run through a fire ball with gasoline all over them. To surprise me more, the host of that epic event announced that these dozen hapless individuals were hand picked among the thousands of applicants after going through a rigorous screening round behind the screen. Our country can't have fools amounting to thousands. No wonder we are still a developing nation, if the host's inaugural speech is correct.

What went after that for a close to a month long painful nonsense can't be scripted. It can only be felt by the poor souls who either have seen the whole Swayambar-1 or Jodha Akbar. Ms.Sawant's acting skills were at it's best when she pictured to be a dream bahu all Sas would love to have. Ekta Kapoor must have her task cut out on what will happen to her serials, if such bahus of the likes of Sawants become plenty? Finally the D-day arrived. The best thing happening to human race. Ms.Sawant selected a joker from the bunch of dozen jokers. I felt the pain would reduce now. But alas, I was second time proved pathetically wrong by the same channel. When many would be healing their wounds inflicted by Swayambar-1 the brilliant minds came up with another show where a dozen of couples, including Ms.Sawant and her latest selected joker, were shown parenting kids of different age group. Honestly I am still getting the pain while describing this mayhem and visual torture.

The inevitable happened finally as expected. Ms.Sawant was back to her theatrical best and seen doing her drama all over again and the poor joker, I don't know where he would be crying with a pillow on his face or worse might be planning to run away to North Pole to live the rest of his life with the Polar Bears. I am not going to write anything on Swayambar-2, as it would be a repetition of same nonsense. The events, characters and proceeding were identical and I don't think the end would be any different either.

In the process I want to console Valmiki to stay cool, which I know is tough but there is no option but to be one, as his idea is very promptly and notoriously being hijacked by the modern day digital Valmikies. Wheather you like it or not, these are going to stay, and I like them also, informed my wife. If you are so concerned about your mental peace, I would suggest you to run away and join that joker in North Pole along with the Polar bears, she added.

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