What The EC Can Do Now?

Now that a constitutional institution is mocked more than Pakistan as a democracy, it is about time something is done about it. First it was a show of clear disrespect to the guidelines laid down decades ago, Salman Khurshid went ahead announcing sops for UP voters in the form of some minority quota, which amounted to violation of the code of conduct. Taking cognizance of such vehemence EC aptly asked Mr. Khurshid to shut up and behave as a senior politician, more so when he is the union law minister. But a mere warning seldom has ever deterred a true brave heart from the land of Bhagat Sings. Has it? So nonchalance was at its peak when the law minister himself forgot to abide the law and went ahead doing the same announcement a few days later, which is in a way showing a thumb to what EC has to say. EC along with his pair of outdated pair of glasses can go to hell for all that matters.
  

What followed after that public slapping of EC can be a shameful episode in our democracy. Rather acting tough on the violator, EC behaved like a cry baby and landed at the door steps of the president sobbing profusely with his complain letter. Conveniently enough, to suppress the unnecessary Halla-Ballo, in parallel, Salman Khurshid asked for an apology from EC. As if that is what precisely the EC was waiting for, he immediately announced the matter as closed and resolved and in all probability seemed more than happy with a mere apology from a defaulter, who perhaps has insulted our great democracy. As history is a proof, examples set the tone for the future mavericks. Hence looking at EC’s action or the lack of it on the whole Salman Khurshid farce, another from the Congress camp named Beni Prasad Varma, pretty much did what Khurshid did earlier. Same disrespect for the law and rule books with little or no respect for an institution of the stature of Election Commissioner.

 

For sure there are words not yet defined in the dictionary to describe such mayhem. This is so disgraceful when our elected representatives don’t seem to realize the value of democracy and its ethos. More than the actions of the two ministers, it is the setting in of a new trend and the complete clownish response of our EC that seems little dangerous. I am not sure of the compulsions or reasons why Mr.Quraishi chickened out when he was needed to handover some exemplary punishment to Khurshid for breaking the law so openly and going against the dictate of the EC. For a certainty this complete non-action made one thing clear – You can mock an institution like the EC of India and it is just an apology which will transform you back to a holy cow again. This precise window gazing and looking like lost in the sea attitude of EC against Khurshid did gave courage to jokers like Beni Prasad Sharma to shamelessly strip the reputation of EC so blatantly and openly.

 

More shameful is the realization that the position Mr. Qurashi is occupying has some astounding no-nonsense individuals honoring at some point of the history. I am sure, had T. N. Sesan been at the helm, no bloody politician would have dared to do even a tenth of what both Salman Khurshid and Beni Prasad Varma did. Because, that man never alone threatened but promptly followed it up with befitting examples. Had there been Sesan, the elections at the constituencies where both of these clowns ashamed the nation would have been long scrapped.

 

Since the reputation is all but lost and the entire CEC office looks more mentally imbalanced than the housemates of Big-Boss, what the EC can do to resurrect their situation and gain the lost grounds, if at all they want to? Perhaps the entire team is clueless and it becomes more than obligatory for people like us to furnish our tips to bail out Mr. Quraishi before he gets slapped publicly at so alarming regularity. So here are my tips (at least 10 of them) for revival.

• Now that there is absolutely no response to the letter on Khurshids cavalier from our president (for obvious reasons) as she is too busy arranging for an anticipatory bail for her son about to be arrested in connection with some one crore unaccountable money, what EC can do regarding Beni Varma’s nonsense? Perhaps write to Obama this time around.

• If the non-action was forced down the throat of EC by powers that be and ordered him to chicken out then the best way to wash off the guilt is self-torture. Mr.Quraishi can go inside the washroom and bolt the door (well every one bolt the washroom door anyway) and slap himself like the way that is shown in one of the Tata motor’s latest advertisements.

• Ohh, I am so happy for Dr. Manmohan Sing now. At least he henceforth won’t feel alienated in this world full with humans and humans only. For a change EC has this great opportunity at hand to write to our PM and let him know that he is not the only one with his misery of ‘being needed but never accounted of’. Rather writing futile long mails to our already sold out president, Mr. Quraishi can write to our PM instead – ‘Sir, you are not the only honorable one. People don’t listen to me either.’

• In contrary, he can go ahead and announce the dictate against all Hindu candidates of UP to not campaign for the election henceforth as they are communal just being Hindu. That would further please the bosses in Shastri Bhawan and who knows Mr. Quraishi might be gifted with the presidential post for his great service to the nation once the cook leaves her position post July.

• He can get in touch with Anna Hazare and convince him to take up his case next time he decides to fast. I mean, this could be the biggest atrocity that can be meted out to a government official holding such a neutral esteemed position.

• Write to Harvard to induct a case study on how one shouldn’t screw up its democratic framework by treating their Election organizers head as a regrettable instance of erectile dysfunction.

• Might call up his counterpart in Pakistan (if they have one) and mock him of his pathetic situation for self-satisfaction.

• Call one of the paid news channels and their paid journalists and utter ‘Val Hopons Var hopon’ and threaten to quite, even though his quitting or sticking onto his position shamelessly doesn’t really matter much for anyone.

• Request ACP Pradyumna to investigate his case with his team of break all doors of the world and prepare a 4283 pages of report which no bloody human would ever care to read through.

• And last but not the least – just leave his gifted post for being from the minority and drive a Taxi in Mumbai. At least Raj Thakray men won’t bash him up in fear of losing some minority votes.

Now that a ten pointer from me, can I ask for a grad dinner from you Mr. Quraishi? At least a breakfast, like what Rahul Gandhi arranged for all the sold out jurnos in his payroll to further cover up the mess that UPA is piling up for last seven odd years?