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    Our USP – We Agitate

    We Indians like controversies. In fact we love them. For us it is no fun if things go their usual self without skirting an outrage or two. It is an absolute disinteresting thing if what we do or say doesn’t revoke an episodic response from every quarter possible. In a way, these controversies add some spice to our average daily lives which otherwise is full with tension, pollution, lot of work or no work to do, random ogling, official lecture on secularism, Cricket and Arnav Goswami’s daily blabbers. So when people start tearing each other’s Kurta for anything and everything, I don’t get dismayed or annoyed but sit back and try to enjoy some ugly street fight. If these childish responses could be and should be replaced by mature thinking is a separate debate; I really don’t mind them coming as long as there is at least some substance behind the action first and the reaction that follows.
    Since the days a certain Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi roam this part of the world, we have developed this tendency to agitate. While Gandhi agitated against the British, we tend to agitate against every damn thing. Few agitate against some nuclear power plant, while few other agitate against lack of electricity in their homes. While few agitate against FDI, few others agitate against the price rise. We agitate against RTE, we agitate against porn movies playing in our theaters, we agitate to have a Mandir, we agitate to have a Mosque, we agitate if someone tweets and we agitate if someone doesn’t tweets. We even agitate and beat the crap out of the poor teacher if students are not allowed to copy in the exams. Hell even we agitate if Sachin Tendulkar is adjudged LBW the wrong way. It seems every reason available on this planet is one agitation worthy cause for us and it is our moral duty to agitate without wasting any time. Now the question arises, why we are so fond of these agitations, Dharnas and Bhasan Wajis? No not because we are aggrieved against the scheme of things but because we are a bunch of entities without much work in our hands. To fill the void in our worthless and workless lives we agitate, with most of the time knowing not an ounce on the reasons of any such agitations.
    Look at this controversy surrounding Ram Jethmalani and his oration about Lord Ram. I am surprised both for what he has to say and the reaction that followed. But, the most surprising part around this farce is that, people actually take Ram Jethmalani seriously. I always felt Mr. Jethmalani is the only entity whom Digvijay Singh must be thoroughly envious of when it comes to showcase of some terrible foot in the mouth syndrome. Didn’t this top grade criminal lawyer of India have gone overboard on many things on many occasions? Be it calling Prophet by names which forced the envoy of UAE to leave the arena in anger or edging Rahul Gandhi and his mother by all possible prophase regularly on Times Now debates while nonchalantly having his evening drinks; he is all over the place, most of the times. I am not sure how good an advocate he is but for sure I have seen him talking nonsense majority of the times he opened his mouth on any issue. Does he anyway in any situation look someone to be taken seriously for anything? Not to me at least. But look at how people still have reacted to his Lord Ram comment. If the statement of Mr. Jethmalani to begin with was horrendous and non-required; the reactions were equally, if not more, bizarre. Most prominent of the lot is the theatrical reaction of that Baba. I still unable to find credible reasons for the announcement of the goon turned Baba, who promised to pay Rs 5 Lakhs if someone obliges Mr. Jethmalani for his comment by spitting on his face. Spitting on the face? Really? Since when spitting on the face of another human has become so noble an accomplishment, if what Mr. Jethmalani said is heinous of an act? From where did that Baba, who claims Lord Ram to be his personal property got this teaching that spitting on someone is just the befitting, moral and religious response for whatever he has done? From Bhagwat Geeta? Isn’t that Baba who pledges himself as the last man standing for Hindutwa and Hindus is equally obnoxious as Mr. Jethmalani himself? Shouldn’t someone rush through and slap that Baba some tight ones for maligning the core ethics of Hindutwa?
    On a second thought, what Mr. Jethmalani said, is it entirely wrong? You feel so? Then please show me one person who dumps his pregnant wife in Jungles, just because a bloody Dhobi casts some funny question mark on her character. Do you condone such act of Lord Ram? You ask me? Well, I feel happy for Lord Ram. On the positive side, this is only good for Lord Ram that it happened some thousand years back. Mr. Jethmalani being a criminal lawyer himself knows very well; had it been today, Lord Ram would have been booked under at least a thousand IPC, starting with dowry harassment and domestic violence act. Forget Lord Ram, even Dasharath and his three wives Kaushalya, Sumitra and Kaikei would have been behind bars already, without being a charge sheet filed. So get a life guys. Just because it is written in so called holy books, it hasn’t had to be correct always. Tolerate different views with an open heart. This is what our great religion teaches us. Isn’t it? Since when Hindutwa has become so intolerant towards criticisms like few other religions when even Lord Krishna by choice has subjected himself to strong reproaches on the battle field of Kurukshetra? I would suggest all those duffers who vouch by the very essence of Hinduism to dig their vacuum brains inside something called Bhagwat Geeta and carefully read each line first before proclaiming themselves to be the flag bearers of the religion. So stop that bloody agitation at once and get back to your work if you have any. If you don’t have any work, then at least allow other productive people to contribute to nation’s growth than becoming a party to your business of spitting at each other’s face.
    I know there would be few who would tear off their balls for the heck of it by reading these two paragraphs. Chill guys, since I am also a staunch and unapologetic Hindu but with a difference. And the difference is, I carry something called brain and I am open to opinions, debates or for that matter outright exchange of blows when it comes to my religion. Except the blows that I mentioned, our religion teaches pretty much every other good attributes of daily life through its scripts. And if at all you care to know, even Lord Ram has admitted to have ditched Mata Sita so that he could put himself to the scrutiny of the cruel world. Lord Ram knowingly let himself to be criticized in order to pass a simple message to the world – “no one is perfect and full with only good qualities or there is no one on this planet who can never do any wrong, even if he is the God himself”. And we jokers have misrepresented the teachings of the Lord via few spitting Cobras like that bounty announcer Baba and cocooned ourselves too much to even look beyond the written lines and see the real teachings behind such deplorable actions of our own Lord. I am sure Lord Ram would be turning in his grave by looking at such clowns who unfortunately happen to be his worshipers.
    But hell with any mature thinking. No? We love to agitate, because we don’t have anything else to do. So let’s agitate like a crazy hoard of ships and jump around like monkeys, without realizing why we should jump. By the way, are you aware of the agitation that brewed somewhere in Kerala because the parents and obviously the students were dead against the prevailing long teaching hours in a school? Argument in for of this craziness – students need enough free hours for other extra-curricular activities. Oh yes; Facebook certainly can’t wait for some bloody textbook to finish.


    1. I thought the blog is on agitations but it turned out be one between two Ram and rest. I think you have been bitten by another Ram,RGV; don't know where you start and what you end with.

    2. This is called confusing your readers Mohammad Bhai :)
      Sent from my BlackBerry®

    3. its true, we agitate even whr its not required.. but our violent agitations are not something for which Mahatma Gandhi can be blamed.. He never ever practiced or supported violent agitations..

      btw u're so right abt jethmalani's evening drinks..