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    Congress Manifesto – 2014, The Deception Book

    It’s a MAXI Post…

    From what it appears Congress is yet again in a mission to fool the nation. After all bad habit seldom gets out of your system. This is that time in an election year when political outfits come up with what they fondly term as their Manifesto. That is, what they would do if they come to power. I am sure most of the political outfits would be forgetting, on what they promised the nation in their respective manifestos, by the time the counting day approaches. Purists might take me as an insane character for considering manifestos of political parties, important enough for a discussion but, then, I can’t stop myself from bewildering when I find the launch of a a sniper assault of what must rank as the vilest form of audacity ever conceived: the Congress party’s manifesto that is. You may now give up all hopes on me of a mental revival and ask – of all the parties, I am taking the joke book of Congress, which they call it as their manifesto, so seriously? But trust me when I say this – the audacity and hypocrisy that Congress yet again showed in the form of this toxic bile, needs some immediate analysis before it is too late. I promise you, we will go through each and every point and expose these selfsame louts and their agenda of deception.

    For starters, the cover page depicts the usual suspects. Rahul Gandhi appearing in a deep thought interaction with a bunch of people. There are at least two oxymoron right there. Rahul Gandhi and fruitful discussion; Smiling people-After talking to Rahul Gandhi. The canvas is complete with a tricolor background and the postage stamp image of Sonia Gandhi and Manmohan Singh (why?), side-by-side at the top right corner. And to insult people, starting with their front page itself, they have this caption – ‘Your Voice, Our Pledge’. Seriously? This is the greatest lie I ever heard after the claim of Shahrukh Khan that he loves driving an i10. Now you flip the first page and the tragedy starts and the loathsomeness of an entire party is exposed like never before.

    How about starting with the plan of Congress party vis-à-vis our Economy? The thing which suffered the most in last 10 years in the hands of these charlatan entities must feature at the top and that is precisely what is been done. Let’s see what is cooking in Congress kitchen to fix our crippled economy

    The Congress will introduce basic rights and welfare package for all working people. Our priority will be to bring India back to 8% inclusive growth path. There will be zero aversion to foreign investment. We will bring "Direct tax Code" and "Goods and Services Tax" Bills, which will increase aggregate revenue. Our detailed "Jobs Agenda" will ensure 10 crore new jobs 
    I tell you, this is the filthiest of plan I have seen coming from an incumbent government. For last 5 years we have a growth path that has nosedived and plummeted to depths that we don’t see we have any economy left with us but ask the morons who are responsible for such plummeting, they are seen busy doing a Bejan Daruwala and narrating all in future tense. Nothing elaborate on how they will achieve the claim when they have failed achieving even half of that in last five years. Are they planning to do some magic there by pulling out a rabbit from Rahul Gandhi’s ear and fix the economy one fine morning? Where are the details about the measures they would take to sooth the deplorable investor confidence in India post Vodafone like fiasco? No update on the possible change of procedures to limit the red-tape and the huge corruption laced there in for the investors to see a conducive environment to invest their money? For sure, without the influx of foreign funds our economy would lose competition with even Bangladesh in near future but the architects of this tragic eventuality are still clueless on what to do to fix their own created mess. And by the way, aren’t we been fed with this ‘Direct Tax’ carrot for last 5 years? But unfortunately, every year Congress manages to accomplish bigger and better scams there by draining the exchequer. So people are left with no option but to dry out their own reserves, in the form of various aggravated taxes so that the central pool remains green for the thugs to loot it further. And the best saved for the last –  the same government which is responsible for drying up at least 15 crore jobs during their tenure are promising a complete turnaround and pull out yet another rabbit from Rahul Gandhi’s, well this time the posterior. 

    Now next comes the labor class

    We will ensure health insurance and pension cover for the entire labour class. There will be special focus on labour working in hazardous industries. All migrant labourers will be covered under the Aadhaar programme within one year. The Unorganised Workers' Social Security Act, 2008 will be implemented in letter and spirit. 
    My mind is crying to ask how? Since the time of Nariman committee of 1978, the same party is dragging its feet in recognizing the unorganized workforce as part of their labor schemes. But suddenly the party which prefers sleeping over welfare measures promises to accomplish something which they couldn’t in last 25 years. Taking the ploy of the Adhar gimmick to accomplish this herculean task speaks great length on the expose of the Adhar scam. And it is not a secret that a good 15% of our unorganized sectors are refugees from Bangladesh and Nepal. By promising them an enrolment under Adhar not only sounds scary but also uncouth. More than helping the labor class the ploy is to garner as many vote banks as possible. The same nonsense was elaborated when voter ID came into picture and we all know to which extent the voter ID was misused in Congress ruled states, especially the areas of Assam. And promising the labor class something like PF and health insurance is like farting in outer space. I am sure the entire labor ministry would scanter for cover if they are asked to list out a minuscule version of the entire unorganized task force, only in a city like Mumbai. But the touts don’t refrain from promising yet another magic by somehow to bite much more than they had chewed in last 60 years of their regrettable presence in governance. 

    Next comes some shameless promise about health.

    The Congress will bring Right to Health and ensure everybody has access to quality healthcare. Health expenditure will be increased to 3% of GDP. Functional toilets will be ensured for every school and household. We will introduce a three-year diploma course in public health. By 2020, our target is to create 6o lakh new jobs in the health sector. 
    There is a reason why I termed this shameless. Here is a party which has ruled the nation for the 90% period of its independence is shameless enough to put something in their manifesto which looks so basic for a nation like India. Does Congress or for that matter any party need to put it in their manifesto to assure all that they will let people enjoy the basics, which even people from war torn nations enjoy? If that is not enough, the charlatans are even promising functional toilets in our schools. I am not sure if Congress party has a bunch of opium addicted rascals in their advisory council or they genuinely feel basics like good schools and hospitals should be counted as a luxury for the citizens, for them to elaborate in their manifesto. That is like promising the nation that we will ensure you don’t have to grease the palms of the Babu when you visit a government office next time. Such promises can only erupt from an uncivilized mind and I am sure there are plenty of them in the Congress party. Forget about it, I am not even commenting on their third magic work of creating 60 lakh jobs in health sector. 

    Next comes some 'Lets divide the nation' ideology. Yes the SC/ST and everything in between.

    We will ensure the passage of Scheduled Castes and Scheduled Tribes (Prevention of Atrocities) Amendment Bill, 2013 provide 1,000 annual overseas scholarships and Skill Development Vouchers of Rs. 10,000 to unemployed graduates. We aim to establish a Special Commission to identify communities that have not benefited from reservations. 
    No comments here since Congress for once sticking to their promise – the promise to keep on dividing the nation on cast lines to as many minute bifurcations. 

    Next, comes the favorite topic of Rahul Gandhi. No, not the RTI but the Women empowerment. No wonder for Congress, women and their empowerment is paramount and they are more than doing their bit to achieve this pious goal.

    Our top priority will be the Women's Reservation Bill and strict implementation of the Child Labour and the Protection of Children from Sexual Offences Act's."One Stop Crisis Centres" for women will be set up in all hospitals. We will ensure all police stations have at least 25% women staffers. We will pass a Citizens' Charter for Women's Safety. 
    Didn’t I say it is the top priority of the prince? But before that, look how shameless this promise itself is. The morons are promising the public that we will ensure that your children won’t be trafficked and pushed into flesh trade. Isn’t this again a basic right of every child in this country to have a healthy, observant and safety environment to grow, educate and become a responsible citizen of this nation? Does a bunch of louts need to promise that in their manifesto as if it is again something which is out of the way and luxury? Even before that, does the state needs an act be passed to safeguard its children from sexual violence? Doesn’t it bestow on the state suo-motto to give safety to each child, with or without a god damn act? Honestly I find the 25% female cops a great idea but looking at how ill-behaved even the existing female cops are, it hardly matters if we increase the number without bringing in any police reform. But sadly, the entire manifesto never talks about such frivolous stuffs. And someone please slap the idiot who thought of jingling the Women reservation bill again. We are hearing it since the days I had a crush on, believe me, Pooja Bhatt. But nothing has happened. If these thugs are so caring for women, why not promise to implement it, starting with the parliament?

     Ahh, the favorite sons of the seculars, the minorities come next.

    We will endeavour to pass the Prevention of Communal and Targeted Violence Bill. Like the Maulana Azad Educational Fund, a corpus will be created to promote entrepreneurship and skill development of minorities. We will enhance our focus on providing reservations for minorities in educational institutes and government jobs   
    Look at the first line. The dreaded bill certainly got the nose ahead as expected. No clarification whatsoever given (not even earlier) on whom one should consider a minority in places like J&K. Touts would tell, logically it is the Hindus but they won’t tell you that because of another notorious manifestation called 377, nothing coming from the union cabinet applies to J&K automatically. For that to happen, the state cabinet must approve it. And how our friendly people of J&K would react to any such grave justice to the Hindus there is anybody’s guess. I am fine with funds being reserved only for minorities since I have already absolved the fact that, the same party has let loose a PM on all of us who finds it legitimate for the minorities to have first right on all and every resources. So reserving few thousand crores for the beloved minorities won’t come as a surprise to me. But here the minorities need to confirm if they have ever gained anything from such gimmicks of this notorious party, other than some perpetual fear. 

    Next comes the youth.

    Our aim is to give India the best education system in the world. We will transform "Sarva Shiksha Abhiyan" to "Shreshth Shiksha Abhiyan," provide state-of-the-art sporting facilities across India and establish a National Sports Education University. Youths from J&K, NE and LWE affected areas will receive special attention. A state-run employment exchange will be opened for those seeking employment abroad.
    Rahul Gandhi is himself a youth so it is only imminent that he would pour his heart out for all his dear subordinates. But here I want to ask why? No not for the eternal love of youthful RG for all other youths but for the reason why I see special mention of J&K, NE and all. Are those youths anything different from an average youth of Maharashtra, Odisha or Tamilnadu? Or is it yet again an attempt at even dividing the youth of the nation in the middle? I know a divided society is a blessing for Congress but I was hoping they would at least spare the youths of the nation from their dirty dreadfulness. And regarding state-of-the-art (I don’t know what that means) sports facilities, they already have masterstrokes like Suresh Kalmadi to take care of that. And the shamelessness par excellence is when they talk about the best education system in the whole world or may be beyond. The guttersnipes don’t realize that after their 60 years misrule, there are at least 40% among us who don’t know how a school looks like, much less the best school in the world. But these selfsame idiots claim to erase any such shameful precedence if they are brought to power again. Not sure from where the clowns are planning to pull another rabbit here. 

    Can the farmers be left too far behind? So they come next

    The Congress will provide its wholehearted support to farmers and continue to nurture the PPP for greater agricultural productivity and exports. Coverage of crop insurance schemes will be increased. We will establish a Ministry of Fisheries to help families dependent on fishing. Concessional loans, up to Rs. 5 lakh, will be provided to collectives of small, marginal and women farmers
    I just want to do a ROFL act right now. Isn’t it the same party which is in power in Maharashtra where the farmer suicide has become so chronic that virtually no farmers left in the state for the count? To top it, isn’t their ally and another of a repugnant character called Ajit Pawar who openly made mockery of farmer’s plight when he asked if he should go and pee around their fields to supplement the shortage of water. Is it the same party which is now turning so vocal for the same farmer’s plight? And by the way, there is no policy framework to improve the situation of the farmers but just hot air. How many of you know who is the minister of fisheries and when we last heard that person doing something relevance? But ask RG, he has this notorious manifesto readily available to throw at your face and explain how the very ministry would come as a savior once he becomes the PM. And hey, is that loan weaver gimmick turned futile that now doles of 5 lakhs is getting rolled out with potential middlemen, politicians, babus and touts already salivating profusely to loot through in between. 

    Now there are some uneventful points after this, which never were of importance for the Congress party and it is evident from their previous behavior. Elaborating how nauseatic those points are wouldn’t do any justice to this blog. 

    So let’s jump to the next big point which matters every one of us, including the great Rahul Gandhi himself. Yes the corruption.

    "The Prevention of Corruption (Amendment) Bill" will give more teeth to state-agencies fighting corruption. The "Prevention of Bribery of Foreign Public Officials and Officials of Public International Organizations Bill, 2011" will bring foreign organizations under its ambit. The "Public Procurement Bill, 2012" will regulate all public procurements by the Central government.  
    I don’t have to explain much here since Congress is already in the path of some big scale self-defiance in this regard. The dutiful love shown in giving tickets to the likes of tainted masterpieces like Ashok Chavan and AK Bansal makes it clear where the priorities of this grossly corrupt party lies. Rest all are pretty much a hogwash. In the name of fighting corruption, these clowns have few sundry acts to lay out in front of us. How I wish such acts can prevent the selfsame like Kalmadi, Raja, Rani and etcetera from digging their hands in and looting with full force. Talking about the teeth; no teeth can bite the asses of the corrupt when the government itself becomes an accomplice in the crime. Had the teeth bestowed with enough power then the certified corrupts of the Congress party would have been roaming around bottom less by now. But what we see is entirely a different saga. The very corrupts are not only hailed but cajoled to come back to power and keep on looting further. I repeat – if only acts were sufficient then by now Sonia Gandhi would have won at least 6-7 Nobel prizes in different categories, just like that. 

    Before we conclude, the last interesting point is the promise of this notorious party on internal security.

    Left Wing Extremism will be dealt with a firm hand. We will strengthen our security forces deployed in LWE affected areas by augmenting equipment, infrastructure and manpower, while also pursuing a development agenda to empower locals.    
    They never cared for the internal security and hence it features at the bottom of the manifesto along with other useless bone of contention like foreign policy and our ex-servicemen. I give that to Congress and Rahul Gandhi. That said, here I object a great lot. How dare RG forget to list the greatest danger to national security, coming in the form of Hindu terrorists? How dare can he single out the Left-Wing extremists? Just how dare he? And talking about providing equipment to our forces needs a radical change in approach, starting with whipping the incompetent AK Antony in public for full 20 minutes. And again should providing proper fighting gears to our forces be part of a manifesto? Shouldn’t this be by default? If so then were these super gentlemen laying eggs till now? Can the morons answer the specifics on why exactly incidents like Sindhuratna occurred? One incompetent defense minister and a cluless priminister once lead to a shameless defeat in the hands of the Chinese and now this Antony may lead to another humiliation if given one more chance.

    I can go a little further and do analysis of other points. But trust me they were highly incomprehensible in the manifesto itself. They are more into making some hollow noise than adding substance to the text. Discussing them would be a sheer wastage of time and giving way much importance to this joker of a party and all its despicable constituents. With this ladies and gentlemen, I rest my case. 


    1. Simply brilliant and no words to describe the analysis. Hope the worthies of Congress read this and hang themselves out of shame (if they are left with) without wasting any moment.

    2. The manifesto was extremely disappointing. It is a direct fight between BJP and Kejriwal this time.Better luck next time Congress.

    3. Thank you for doing the analysis. If they could accomplish even 10% of the tall promises they made they would deserve a Nobel prize. Being Congress, we would be lucky if they accomplished .0000001% (though they won't get the chance in 2014 I hope).

      Have you ever done a post comparing their 2009 manifesto to what they have actually accomplished? I know politicians never deliver everything they promise but in this case I wouldn't be surprised if the country has actually regressed over the last 5 years. For example, they claim to have pulled 150 million people out of poverty but since population has grown by more than 4x that, hasn't the percentage of population in poverty actually increased?

    4. Before the elections in 2009, our mute PM has promised to control the prices with in 100 days after coming into power. But, as no such wonder has ever happened in the timeframe mentioned, some one took the help of RTI, seeking an explanation from the PMO.
      The response of PMO was like they don't consider what has been promised during election campaign and hence they don't need to respond on that RTI.
      So, all these tall promises of this Thappad party also would be very much similar to that 100 days promise and hence nothing in this manifesto needs to be taken seriously.

    5. Oh wow!!.. what a write-up.. you pulled ears of this stupig RAGA very well, initially I expected something from this nerd. But alas! all my dreams to see a better india shatters like anything...
      I admire a strong man (be it wrong or worse) who have courage to deliver, and a man came as SUP after ruling and running a great governance. Let's hope the people of india are not going to be decepted by his MONEYFASTO....