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    Battleground Uttar Pradesh!!

    Now that the cow belt is going for poll, as expected we have more tantrums than focusing on real issues. The state which is most populous in India is at it again to choose yet another from the jokers lot to lead (read loot) them for next five years. When I say another, I no way suggested that the population won’t decide to continue with the present clownish colony which is looting, raping, cheating, hoodwinking and with all optimism governing them for last half a decade. Don’t believe me? Then just take your time and count the number statues of a living legend called Mayawati and how the number has long surpassed the number of schools and hospitals in the state put together.
    So there are agendas beyond anyone can count to bring it to the citizens than just the 4.5% minority sub-quota that the Congress stalwarts are finding very convenient to orate in every damn political rally they get into. Watch out Mr. Salman Khursid, you already are in muddy waters.
    The tumbling state of affairs when it comes to law and order of the state; the pathetic stature of the development index which in one and every way looks sorrier than the present touted Indian batting lineup; how the least basic facilities like good healthcare is far from reach for an average Paan chewing Upiet; the most number of malnutrition cases getting noticed, which are more frequent than Deepika Padokone switching her Boyfriends and the most evident proof of human psychic excellence where an ugly looking human building her own statues left-right-and-center overlooking the starving kids. The issues of concern are more than just plenty and handful. But sad enough, none that who are eyeing the biggest political pie this time are bothered enough to highlight these unholy facts but engaged in jingoisms that would even have Rakhi Shawant a healthy laugh on it.
    From the very childish dictate of our CEC to cover all the dirt of the state to Rahul Gandhi’s marital status; we had all being discussed and thrown at us but the real issues which the least we as citizens expect to be debated in such elections are all but dumped in the nearest dustbin.
    A closer look at the state and its standing, gives us no confidence in announcing it ever been governed by the guidelines of democratic frameworks. We still have a good 60% of the state who in all likelihood go to their bed empty stomach. We have a sorry looking police reform in the state where we find the so called public servants either beating a chained minor or a hapless lady before the full glare of the camera in a vindication of many that we would have become another China long back had we never had a rotten monkey on our backs called Uttar Pradesh.
    Who is to blame for this? Is it the misrule of the hawks in disguise like Mulayam Sing Yadav or Mayawati? Or is it the general attitude of the people of Uttar Pradesh who never want to elevate themselves but love to migrate to places like Mumbai and get their asses thrashed black and blue by yet another set of scoundrels, we could have been better off without? Whom we should held accountable for the half-starved, half-necked and half educated populous of the state when we see almost all Prime-Ministers of our country being from there? When we see from Chachaji to Rajiv Gandhi; all belonging to a state where still half of its citizens would fail miserably while spelling their own state’s name correctly; we would struggle greatly to pinpoint at the exact blood sucking leeches that had sucked the shit out of the state and with all probability still sucking.
    In a ghastly situation like this where the right to good governance of the citizens is farfetched, we need only look at the astounding collection of characters that are fighting their ass out this time to make a point in the upcoming polls. At the forefront of them is a college dropout, who never had anything but to utter the same lines time and again as if suffering from some classic case of mental instability. As a sign of belongingness, the person who has slept overnight in more Dalit huts than the different number of men Paris Hilton could have slept with; the person who would have been bitten more number of times (more times than Bangladesh possibly have been beaten in Test cricket) by those non-secular mosquitoes; need to answer some tough questions first before going on with his regular barrage of accusing one and all in every political gathering of his. First of them would be to let all of us know; in the period of last 65 years of our independence, which party has ruled for the maximum time in UP. Hence in the simple equation of mathematical expression, who should greatly be blamed for the disastrous position of the state? While he is seen busy questioning everyone but his own party for the mess in the state he must be reminded of his forefathers who pretty much did nothing to elevate the sorry picture of their own state which he fancies criticizing every time he is seen up in the stage with a bottle of mineral water.
    Forget the bloody state. For a starter someone please slap him for the sorry state of his own constituency called Amethi. A dancing Bill Gates around the fire with Dalit women is not going to bring any kind of development, let alone a Microsoft development center.
    If you think Rahul Gandhi is the worst case scenario then just hold your thoughts and look at the other marvels in the fray. Not to be left behind in jamboree and making democracy a family affairs the SP had their own Yuvraj, Akhilesh Yadav donning the mantle to defeat Rahul Gandhi on his own backyard of sickening politics. Boy, doesn’t he sound exact pretentious, vultureous and filthy like his opportunist father Mulayam? Even the bloody voice sounds so similar to that of the senior cunning fox? The same party which did nothing than filling their own notorious coffer the last time they were in power is questioning the loot of Mayawti? That is funnier than the choice of Devegowda as the Prime-Minister of India. Let me assure you the Yadav father-and-son duo of an imminent setback; bigger than the Dallal-E-Hindustan Amar Sing leaving you guys and moving on with his own collection of fabricated CDs. Half of your party men might well commit suicide, looking at the outcome, come March 6th. As a suggestion for mental peace in the month of Tax paying, please leave aside your ego and be thankful to the almighty if Akhilesh himself manages to win his own goddamn legislative. And yes, we are not yet become America when it comes to elections. We seldom care glamour in our elections more than what ICICI bank cares for its customers and certainly a voluptuous Dimple Yadav can’t save you from a possible elimination. That said you can still try your luck with the ever notorious Abu Azmi’s daughter-in-law.
    And boy, just look at the answers of Uma Bharti when asked about the bachelorhood of Rahul Gandhi. Ms. Bharti, was it more of a choice or there weren’t many who agreed to have a matrimonial alliance? By the way, why didn’t you just slap them in utter disdain if the later was the case?
    What about Mayawati? Well for me, the statues always speak louder than words.


    1. hahaha too cool, but you missed BJP in it with kushwaha saga..Though, i support BJP, nitin gadkari had hitwicket with kushwaha episode.

    2. Awesome.. a good read. I am assured that Indian Elections are caste based always.. That is How Congress has managed power so far. EC needs to be much stricter with Khursheed as the damage has been done.. he has promised the carat and I doubt if Indian Muslims will try and look as Gujrat for development rather than Riots. Hope History doesnt repeat and we get a better govt than scoundrels

    3. The Ultimate Winner

      In its election manifesto , Samajwadi Party has promised :

       A free tablet for every student passing out of 10th standard ( ie: approx 5 million students )

       A free laptop for every student passing out of 12th standard ( ie: approx 3.5 milion students )

      Yesterday , in a TV interview , Akhilesh Yadav has confirmed that his party will fulfill its promises

      Already , Jaylalitha ( AIADMK ) has made a similar promise during last year’s elections in TamilNadu , which brought her to power

      By now , TN Govt has already placed orders for Rs 1300 Crore worth of orders on Indian Manufacturers for supply of laptops !

      And , to fulfill her promise , she must place similar-size orders every year for the next 4 years , till her term expires

      It will be the same in UP for the next 5 years

      I believe , Prakash Singh Badal who just won the state elections in Punjab has made similar promise – and he would not want to be accused of not having kept his promise when 2017 elections arrive !

      No doubt , Gouda in Karnataka and Modi in Gujarat , who face State elections in a few months , will want to capitalize on this “ winning formula “

      Before long , 50 million Indian students will be getting tablets / laptops , every year !

      So , who is the ultimate winner in elections ?

      Without doubt , the computer manufacturers !

      With regards

      hemen parekh


      Jobs for All = Peace on Earth

    4. Priceless Possessions ?

      Who says there is no “ free lunch “ in the world ?

      Jayalalitha ( AIADMK ) Government ( State of Tamilnadu – India ), completed one year in office on May 16th

      And true to its election manifesto promises , it is distributing following “priceless “ possessions , to its people :

       Rice

       Mixes

       Grinders

       Electric fans

       Footwear

       Domestic animals ( including “ pets “ for the rich ? )

       Milch Cows / Sheeps ( for the poor )

       1,51,430 laptops to students

      Now , Chief Minister of Gujarat , Narendra Modi , is an admirer of politically astute Jayalalitha

      And he is about to release his election manifesto in a few months, for the forthcoming State Assembly elections in Dec 2012

      So , expect him to promise “ priceless “ homes to all poor people of Gujarat !

      That will ensure his victory and his nomination as his party’s “ Prime Ministerial Candidate “ in 2014 National elections

      With regards

      Hemen Parekh


      Jobs for All = Peace on Earth